The Opinion of Friends and Family
In our critique group meeting this week, the subject of sharing one’s work in progress came up. After batting around the various pros and cons of giving our manuscripts to family and friends, the three of us decided that less people outside of the group we share with, the better. Because it came down to, what do we really want from these people?
Gushing enthusiasm. Encouragement. Affirmation. Yeah, that’s what we want. But is it really helpful? A gave the first hundred pages to a friend a few weeks ago, and has yet to hear from him. You can imagine what this does to a writer. The delay could only mean the worst, right? It either means the friend simply hasn’t gotten around to it (bad—he must not be interested in it at all) or he’s slogging through it (really bad—the writing must be dull and the plot non-existent).
So what happens when A gets his story back with his friend’s comments? What if his friend gushes with enthusiasm and tells him that he’s the next [insert famous author here]? What if he says that nothing’s wrong with it and perfect? Is that going to help A?
No way.
Ten months after I started writing my first book, I sent my first chapter to a published author in a local writing organization I belong to. I sent it off, visions of this woman writing, It’s wonderful! I couldn’t put it down! You should get an agent right now!
You can only guess, can’t you? Needless to say, this woman ripped it to shreds. I remember getting it back and sitting in my dark kitchen for three hours without moving. Didn’t cry. Didn’t booze. Just thought. And eventually came to the realization that this woman was right. About everything. I read her critique over and over until the light began to leak in, little by little, and finally understood that I shouldn't trust the opinion of someone who read my work and said it was perfect.
Think about it. Unless your friends and family are writers, they can only give you limited feedback that may not be as helpful as someone who knows how to critique. They may be able to say there was something wrong with chapter six, that they didn’t like it as much, but can they be specific? Maybe. But someone with experience will be able to pinpoint the problem. For instance, that person may tell you that the hero’s motivation for what he did in chapter six didn’t make sense, that you slipped out of deep point-of-view, and the description of the restaurant needs to be tightened. Could a person who doesn’t understand the mechanics of writing a novel tell you that? Don’t think so.
Once the book was done I gave it to three people. A, his wife, and a friend, K, who I’ve known since college. J wasn’t in our critique group then, or I would’ve given it to her as well. Nobody said it was perfect the way it was. Everyone had suggestions on how to improve it, and K actually had the same ideas as me on how I could change it for the better.
So this leads into my writing tip (I’d say ‘writing tip of the day’, but since I don’t update this thing every day…) for today. Choose carefully the people you will share your work with. And don’t trust anyone who says your writing is perfect.
In our critique group meeting this week, the subject of sharing one’s work in progress came up. After batting around the various pros and cons of giving our manuscripts to family and friends, the three of us decided that less people outside of the group we share with, the better. Because it came down to, what do we really want from these people?
Gushing enthusiasm. Encouragement. Affirmation. Yeah, that’s what we want. But is it really helpful? A gave the first hundred pages to a friend a few weeks ago, and has yet to hear from him. You can imagine what this does to a writer. The delay could only mean the worst, right? It either means the friend simply hasn’t gotten around to it (bad—he must not be interested in it at all) or he’s slogging through it (really bad—the writing must be dull and the plot non-existent).
So what happens when A gets his story back with his friend’s comments? What if his friend gushes with enthusiasm and tells him that he’s the next [insert famous author here]? What if he says that nothing’s wrong with it and perfect? Is that going to help A?
No way.
Ten months after I started writing my first book, I sent my first chapter to a published author in a local writing organization I belong to. I sent it off, visions of this woman writing, It’s wonderful! I couldn’t put it down! You should get an agent right now!
You can only guess, can’t you? Needless to say, this woman ripped it to shreds. I remember getting it back and sitting in my dark kitchen for three hours without moving. Didn’t cry. Didn’t booze. Just thought. And eventually came to the realization that this woman was right. About everything. I read her critique over and over until the light began to leak in, little by little, and finally understood that I shouldn't trust the opinion of someone who read my work and said it was perfect.
Think about it. Unless your friends and family are writers, they can only give you limited feedback that may not be as helpful as someone who knows how to critique. They may be able to say there was something wrong with chapter six, that they didn’t like it as much, but can they be specific? Maybe. But someone with experience will be able to pinpoint the problem. For instance, that person may tell you that the hero’s motivation for what he did in chapter six didn’t make sense, that you slipped out of deep point-of-view, and the description of the restaurant needs to be tightened. Could a person who doesn’t understand the mechanics of writing a novel tell you that? Don’t think so.
Once the book was done I gave it to three people. A, his wife, and a friend, K, who I’ve known since college. J wasn’t in our critique group then, or I would’ve given it to her as well. Nobody said it was perfect the way it was. Everyone had suggestions on how to improve it, and K actually had the same ideas as me on how I could change it for the better.
So this leads into my writing tip (I’d say ‘writing tip of the day’, but since I don’t update this thing every day…) for today. Choose carefully the people you will share your work with. And don’t trust anyone who says your writing is perfect.
posted by cate at 12:17 PM
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